these insatiate old thoughts
demand justice for their restlessness;
they are the demons i keep lashed tight
inside my fists and the early-morning dreams
i refuse to voice on paper;
an unbridled verse
wrapped up inside all the pretty words;
a vengeance
for all that ever died quietly
but was not at peace.

running nearly barefoot through the semidarkness,
they clamor in my chest
out of time with my heartbeat,
stumble over roots as they dig down deep,
truths as they reach skyward.
goosefleshed and bitten, their heels as they fly
are soaked through with dew or
something more sinister;
like you, they desire only that i would be more clear.

4 thoughts on “acknowledgement

  1. Well certainly you showed one of the major reasons for writing poetry. Emotions can’t be held within for long and when they come out with passion indeed poetry is created,

  2. In the third line, didn’t you mean to write “leash”? The current word, “lash” doesn’t make complete sense. Alright now, the typo(?) has been pointed out. On to the poem:
    I liked the poems in bits and pieces, but not uniformly. My favourite part being the last two lines of the first stanza.

    for all that ever died quietly
    but was not at peace.

    In the second stanza, “out of time with my heartbeat” is not up to the mark, in fact, in my opinion, you should be putting “out of sync … ” in that line.

    i did actually mean “lash”; the idea of “leashing or “unleashing” one’s demons is too expected, and i think the two verbs give comparable feelings. the piece was not meant to be entirely predictable 🙂

    the two lines you mention as the ones you liked best are also my two favorites; they ring the truest, i think.

    i like your suggestion of “sync” for “time” in the last part; thanks. i appreciate your input.

  3. I’ll second an appreciation for

    “a vengeance
    for all that ever died quietly
    but was not at peace.”

    These were the lines in the poem that really grabbed my attention, and I like the implication of vital thoughts dying away and fading before you can capture them or find some resolution.

    I would actually suggest cutting the two lines that precede them. I also liked the delayed rhyming of “dew” with “you”.

    I’m glad you liked Vigil, thanks for tapping me on the shoulder. I like your combination of photography with poetry, and it’s always a pleasure to see what other people are writing.


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