crawled out of this morning;
i was blowing the dead leaves
from its still downy hair
when two new twinned
lives grinning arrived
in the backseat of
Somebody’s dreamcatcher
and with fingers like
microscopes
examined every
strand of me; i carried them
like pistols on each hip,
aimed at the world and all
the cries of its
renewal.
The visual and sound references work extremely well, along with a collective tactile sense when from the actions. Not a wasted word with a regenerative feel and theme; fitting for spring.
ha. this was wicked…fingers like microsopes to wonder becoming pistols of renewal…i like, alot…
I love the feeling from this. wonderful poem!
excellent word usage and visuals…great share…cheers pete
The backseat of somebody’s dreamcatcher — now THAT is some good poetry indeed!
Thanks.
You paint a very detailed picture with language that begs to be heard. Nice.
Forgive me all for the late response to your kind comments– poem-a-day work plus wedding this weekend plus multiple reading events this month makes me a little behind– and a little crazy.
Dustus, “regenerative” was definitely what I was going for. Thanks.
pete, Carl– always a pleasure. Appreciate your kind words.
brian, “wicked”– nice. thanks. π
Jannie– wow, glad you liked it– I definitely agonized over that line in particular π
M.A.S., painting with words– it’s what we do, right? π Thanks for stopping by.
*off to write some more*
Happy April everybody!
π
–jsl
Susanna, i read this the day you posted it … still intrigued by “the backseat of
Somebodyβs dreamcatcher”, especially the cap’ed S … i suppose, a perfect place for two new twinned lives … *grin*
as always, slightly obscure yet fully accessible language and now a familiar voice … beautiful seasonal imagery, yes.
i hope spring finds you well …
noxy.
oh, i forgot to say “loved the title!!!” …
noxy,
thanks for dropping by, and the sentiments. glad you were intrigued! always a pleasure to hear from you.
best,
joanna
Make those pistols work, i noticed they were a bit snobby to you at first. lol
Great poem Siubhan
lol not snobby exactly, just… anxiety-inducing… π Thanks, Richard.
Wonderful. I love it. Skillful and emotive. I especially am impressed by the way you graft together literal and figurative meanings in a single turn of phrase. You are very good at this.
cheers. i’m very glad you liked it. not sure if it’s the stuff of baby books, but… …well, i’m just glad you liked it. π