An owl-
eyed moon hangs
low like overripe fruit,
menacing the hot
horizon with her glowy
berth. Sweat
beads on the skin
of rooftops, perspiring
night-dreams of a dirt-nailed
city bent on creating
itself. The river drowses uneasily.
It smells
like jungle, and sex.
There is good mud here, and this
is no time for sleeping indoors.
Wild things
etch their names into wet
downtown cement, pile
old bricks into hillforts
from which they fling love
songs at one another
and think slyly of revolution.
Laughing, we
shake the moondust
out of wind-blown hair
and run to catch
the current,
kiss the river
goodnight.
Wow, this is beautiful.
Forgotten man
The source flows sweet
By his front door
Where he labors
In fitful dreams
This night could be
The end or the beginning
But he is likely
Not to be aroused
By cicadas, mewing kittens
Or his own hard on
Oblivious
Catching his rest
From meaningless careers
The full moon
Does not touch his soul
And the languid river
Only makes him
More drowsy.
Thanks, as always, Tiger, for sharing your gifts with me here. i feel sorry for this “forgotten man”; i wish he could see what he is missing…
Peace & love,
–jsl
Reeally like the brick song-forts. Thanks for –
Peter G.
wow – this is awesome writing… a dirt-nailed
city bent on creating
itself – smelling like jungle and sex – they are the same all over the world…and you just nailed it…nice to meet you
thanks, claudia. π i think i may have run across you before at the One Shot; loving this new poetic venue at dVerse!
sorry – sometimes i just lose myself in the poetic flow…and always glad when i remember my own name…smiles..
read this piece again and really love it…
really a wonderful flow…the two line break in the middle works well…and the second stanza has some great textures in it…go join the river…
thanks, brian. think i will… π nice to see you round, as always.
Beautiful word pictures… “shake the moondust out of wind-blown hair”
Sweat
beads on the skin
of rooftops, perspiring
night-dreams of a dirt-nailed
city bent on creating
itself. The river drowses uneasily.
It smells
This brought forth our recent trip down the Nile. Cairo rang in my ears. Excellent work.
Your imagery always astounds me. The opener in particular here –
An owl-
eyed moon hangs
low like overripe fruit,
funnily enough my poem also features a fat moon, and teh moon was the theme in a prompt/contest we ran on the Facebook crit group I admin. Lunacy!
haha, lunacy indeed, Luke! i gotta get over to your FB group one of these days… thanks for dropping by– it’s always a pleasure. π
This is so very good, just replete with sensory images that drew me into the poem. Hope to see more of you.
Great imagery and great flow…lovely!
Hot poetry with inspiring imagery. Wow!
Marvelous imagery and pacing!
WoW! This is amazing!
Totally vivid!
Nicely done!
Very evocative! I especially enjoyed these lines:
There is good mud here, and this
is no time for sleeping indoors.
Thanks, David! Those lines stood out particularly for me, too–one of my favorite parts in the piece.
This is so good. I count on that now. Every single poem you write is sure to be rewarding.
I love all the things I get to think about with these lines:
“The river drowses uneasily.
It smells
like jungle, and sex.”
I love the whole thing.
Carl, you’re making me blush again. It’s always so nice to hear your kind comments. Thanks.
The way you start talking about sweat and then have it coming from rooftops – that angled view of reality. Most intriguing. There is so much fertile imagery in this, and I look forward to developing a better understanding of your work.
Since the last poem was so edgy, this one might be a good palette cleanser:
http://sharplittlepencil.wordpress.com/2011/07/20/deer-one-poetic-bloomings/
Peace, Amy
Thanks Amy, Andy, ayala, Anna, Anon and all who took the time to read and drop a comment– I appreciate each and every one. You guys are awesome.
Off to get ready for some …well, not quite “Pub,” but more “wine bar” poetics this evening. *butterflies* π
Peace,
–jsl
It’s a city after dark when the sunlight has forsaken her secrets with no more shadow to hide behind. I could smell it, indeed! Fantastic!
Excellent poem– shows an accomplished sensibility at work. Join us at http://fridaypoetryfest.blogspot.com — love to have you– all best– Jenne’
Love it!
Thanks, ladies! Jenne- I’ll be sure to check it out! π
Fantastic. I have good (but mostly bad) memories of my activities at a quarter past two. What an interesting and creative thing to write about… Great work, I’m looking forward to reading more of your poetry.
If you get a chance, check out my site.
http://lyricsaspoetry.wordpress.com
Pregnant with imagery and metaphor almost every line. It is the kind of stuff that keeps me reading and hungry for more.