because while some truths lend themselves to equations, others are best described in verse

character study no.1

When she arches her spine,
the line of her chin cuts
like a laser; the sway of her hair
smells of late-summer roses.
Her hips
are glorious;
her calves, twin plumes
of aerosolized ecstasy.
Her puddled skirt
drips secret joys
onto night canvasses best
found in oblivion.

But as the fog lifts off the river, she
shrinks like an angel’s
trumpet in the rising sun,
her pale pink petals
thorning and wilted.
The slats of half-closed blinds
leave stippled
oubliettes across
the valley of her back.
Forlorn,
he pricks
until she bleeds,
puddling her blue iron
tears onto narrow
pineboard floors.

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25 responses

  1. Yow. That was quite something. Thanks for it.

    October 18, 2011 at 2:14 pm

    • I guess that’s a good thing? Err… you’re welcome? 🙂

      October 19, 2011 at 11:06 pm

  2. simply beautiful!

    October 18, 2011 at 3:03 pm

  3. well i want her.

    October 18, 2011 at 3:29 pm

    • sweet. i’ll be sure to let her know she’s appreciated.

      October 19, 2011 at 11:05 pm

  4. Achingly beautiful!

    October 18, 2011 at 3:34 pm

  5. Compelling write, nicely done!

    October 18, 2011 at 5:41 pm

  6. expatinCAT

    This is writing with a capital w.. // Peter.

    October 18, 2011 at 6:07 pm

    • 😉 gracias, Peter.

      October 19, 2011 at 11:03 pm

  7. whew emotive write…at night she comes alive yet wilt in the heat of the sun…yet still be pricks until she bleeds….very nice descriptions through out…and thanks again for a wonderful time this weekend!

    October 18, 2011 at 6:36 pm

    • Thanks, brian, and thank you, too, for coming out this past Fri.–was again so nice to meet you & hear a taste of your poetry live. 🙂

      October 19, 2011 at 11:03 pm

  8. The language alone is compelling, draws one in, in my case, perhaps a little too deep! I am sad now, and will be haunted by the write. Sign of good writing, indeed.

    October 18, 2011 at 7:03 pm

    • Hopefully not haunted too much! A deep compliment indeed. Thank you.

      October 19, 2011 at 11:01 pm

  9. Your words paint the woman right before my eyes – one could almost reach out and touch her. Lovely character capture.

    October 18, 2011 at 7:06 pm

  10. Have you ever read ancient Persian poetry?They had a genre for describing women this way , very sensual with creative imagery and sexual but never in a nasty or degrading way. My mind recalled as soon as I began reading.

    October 18, 2011 at 10:25 pm

    • Sadly I haven’t, Carl, but your description makes me realize I would like to very much. Can you point me in the right direction with any particular works? Thanks.

      October 19, 2011 at 11:00 pm

  11. wow, what a write. one of my favorite parts,

    Her puddled skirt
    drips secret joys
    onto night canvasses best
    found in oblivion

    wonderfully done 🙂

    October 18, 2011 at 10:26 pm

  12. amazing how you can paint the women before everyone’s eye such a wonderful talent and style in your poetry so well done
    http://gatelesspassage.com/2011/10/18/farewell-my-three-legged-friend/

    October 19, 2011 at 1:40 am

  13. hedgewitch

    Excellent language for a piece that seems almost pure evocative description until you stab your message through in the final lines. Esp like the oubliettes line.

    October 19, 2011 at 3:15 pm

  14. Thank you everyone for your kind words. This was a hard write in a lotta ways, and it means quite a bit to hear all your positive comments.

    Peace & love,
    –jsl

    October 19, 2011 at 11:08 pm

  15. impressive description of her, in a haunting scene.

    well done.

    October 20, 2011 at 10:51 am

  16. words weaved in half transparent layers, each line giving a glimpse of what’s beneath, intimate writing, I would love to read study no. 2 with the chain around the wood bursting open.

    October 20, 2011 at 2:03 pm

  17. the word bar

    I read your responses and you said this was a hard write..
    that explains why it is so deeply felt..
    the poems we dig deep for, peel back the layers for, are the Ones!!

    wonderful po here!

    October 21, 2011 at 6:48 pm

  18. very beautifully written … loved coming to your blog 🙂

    October 21, 2011 at 11:50 pm

  19. First, I wanted to know her and then I wanted to save her. Powerful piece!

    October 28, 2011 at 11:56 pm

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