character study no.1

When she arches her spine,
the line of her chin cuts
like a laser; the sway of her hair
smells of late-summer roses.
Her hips
are glorious;
her calves, twin plumes
of aerosolized ecstasy.
Her puddled skirt
drips secret joys
onto night canvasses best
found in oblivion.

But as the fog lifts off the river, she
shrinks like an angel’s
trumpet in the rising sun,
her pale pink petals
thorning and wilted.
The slats of half-closed blinds
leave stippled
oubliettes across
the valley of her back.
Forlorn,
he pricks
until she bleeds,
puddling her blue iron
tears onto narrow
pineboard floors.

25 thoughts on “character study no.1

  1. whew emotive write…at night she comes alive yet wilt in the heat of the sun…yet still be pricks until she bleeds….very nice descriptions through out…and thanks again for a wonderful time this weekend!

  2. The language alone is compelling, draws one in, in my case, perhaps a little too deep! I am sad now, and will be haunted by the write. Sign of good writing, indeed.

  3. Have you ever read ancient Persian poetry?They had a genre for describing women this way , very sensual with creative imagery and sexual but never in a nasty or degrading way. My mind recalled as soon as I began reading.

  4. Excellent language for a piece that seems almost pure evocative description until you stab your message through in the final lines. Esp like the oubliettes line.

  5. words weaved in half transparent layers, each line giving a glimpse of what’s beneath, intimate writing, I would love to read study no. 2 with the chain around the wood bursting open.

  6. I read your responses and you said this was a hard write..
    that explains why it is so deeply felt..
    the poems we dig deep for, peel back the layers for, are the Ones!!

    wonderful po here!

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